How to strengthen relationships?

Strengthen relationships, first and foremost with our own self

Now-a-days our relationships are strained and we realized the need to work on them. Before we work on our relationship with others, first there is a need to strengthen our relationship with our self.  If we have taken care of our self then the relationship with the other person is automatically taken care of. It seems pointless, but it is true. Yes, this should be the first foundation step towards fixing our relationships.

1.  Form a relationship with your own self. For this, we need to know our self. Wondering ‘how will I know myself’ or ‘don’t I know myself’? We knowing our self means being aware of our thoughts.  If we can sense or see our thoughts with our mind’s eye then we can direct them towards positivity. A person, who has self-control on his thoughts, can master any skill; it can be even fixing strenuous relationships, with a boss or in-laws or an old friend.  Know that, we are the creators of our own thoughts. See yourself and every person interacting with you as a pure soul. This minimizes many issues in relationships.
2.  Stop abusing yourself with worry and fear of future: Every one of us has an addiction. For example: fear of future, worry, feeling of unfulfilled desires, negativity, loss of hope, hurting our self with our own memories, alcoholism, etc. These are all our habits/thoughts that are eating us from inside. The only profit from these wasteful thoughts is that we are depleting our energy at a rocket speed. Our body is the temple of the pure soul/ spirit/energy, i.e. I, the soul. All this baggage we dumped on it will wear us down. Gently remove these habits or thoughts one after another with positive thinking such as, “I am a happy, loving and peaceful soul”. 
3. Search for the LOVE inside you to replace the bliss that an addiction or a false relaxing activity is giving. False relaxing activities are: shopping, watching a movie when we are sad, consuming alcohol, smoking, going into past and reliving the moments, chatting with friends, etc. These acts will never cure our pain; they only help us to forget the issue for a while. Because, the issue will not vanish until we resolve it in our mind. We are the best doctor and medicine for our own addictions/stress/hurt. Dig in and search for the abundant treasure of happiness inside you. Remember you are a happy being because you are the creator of your thoughts.We can do this in a millionth of a second and we can land on the planet of happiness, right in our–self, our own MIND. Happy discovering-self.
4.  Work on stabilizing your relationships: Hard to handle relationships and situations fall in place automatically once we have taken care of our self. For example, you have a conflict with your boss, life partner, in-law. How do you resolve these?  …..Continuation in next part…

By Brahma kumaris